Wednesday, September 5, 2007

it's movie night...

the movie at VT tonight is The Painted Veil. i asked mom if she wanted to go see it. she said she would. i told her i'd be back around 5:30.

"oh, you don't have to do that. i can just go by myself. (pause) where will it be?"

"in the media room.
(hug) i'll see you at 5:30, mom."

good grief, gertie... holy moley... not only No, but Hell no!...what in the cornbread hell?...

No...she's not allowed to go ANYwhere by herself. she complains about that fact so often i'm really surprised she thought otherwise, even if only for a moment. aside from not remembering where we go to watch movies at least once a week, she'd never find the freakin' media room by herself even if she were permitted to try.
(
i can just hear it now: "9-1-1... 9-1-1...calling all mounties, bloodhounds and clairvoyants...mary anne is ON the loose...")


i just googled the movie and it's got sex scenes.
eeew!
...i'm not too keen on watching sex scenes with my mom.

and it's apparently got some gore and violence in it, too. i don't do gore or graphic violence. when my kids and i used to watch movies together and something like that came on screen, they learned to warn me in advance to close my eyes if they knew what was coming up
(dad. close your eyes.) and even if they didn't know, they would tell me when it was ok to look again.

so i'm a wuss. wanta make somethin' of it?

i'm tempted to just not show up. she likely won't remember anyway. of course there's always the chance she will remember for once.
no, on 2nd thought, i think i'll call her and tell her to go on without me. (Hahahahaha, just kidding, but i probably will call and cancel.)


hmm...it's based on a novel by somerset maugham. i've never read it, but one of my all time favorite movies, The Razor's Edge, was based on a maugham novel of the same name. it starred bill murray and is a rare case of a movie being as good, or maybe even better, than the book.

so yes, i'm still waffling on whether
or not to go. the painted veil stars edward norton and he's pretty darn good...

and how's this for irony. from IMDb: "view content advisory for parents"
somehow i feel like that phrase means something different to me than is intended.



[updated 6:23 p.m]

no. i did not end up takin' mom to the movie. after watching a clip of it i decided i'd be the one bored this time. but i also did not blow her off.
knowing the chances were slim to none that an aide would take her, i came up with a devious plan by which i was able to kill 3 or 4 birds with 1 stone:

!- i showed up promptly at 5:30 (i did what i said i'd do. check.)

@- i said, right in front of one of the aides, "say, mom, i looked the movie up on the internet and i'm not sure i'm comfortable taking you to it. i mean...well...there are sex scenes and stuff..." (i was honest. check.)

#- we all had a hearty laugh. (always a good thing. check.)

$- she and the aide looked at each other and the aide said, "well, Mary Anne, i guess I could take you." (buaahhahahah. CHECK!)

%- i didn't have to go, but mom still got to. (double check.)

^- (snort)

9 comments:

flintysooner said...

I don't recall that movie ever. I don't remember liking Maugham very much but I think the only thing I read, or tried to, was Of Human Bondage. I need to like someone in novels and I don't think I liked anyone in his.

Excellent tactics!

cornbread hell said...

check out the razor's edge if you get a chance. i liked bill murray's character. of course i was younger then. i wonder if i still would?

flintysooner said...

I had to research it. A great story about the making of the 1984 movie, particularly the part about Murray including a tribute to Belushi. And yet apparently the screenplay is truer to the book than the first movie.

I loved this quote: "The man I am writing about is not famous. It may be that he never will be. It may be that when his life at last comes to an end he will leave no more trace of his sojourn on earth than a stone thrown into a river leaves on the surface of the water. But it may be that the way of life that he has chosen for himself and the peculiar strength and sweetness of his character may have an ever-growing influence over his fellow men so that, long after his death perhaps, it may be realized that there lived in this age a very remarkable creature."

Too bad it was such a financial disaster.

I'll try to pick up a copy.

cornbread hell said...

when i saw the movie in 1984, the year my first child was born, i was blown away.

having read the book years before that, i was anxious to see it, but skeptical that murray could convey the depth of maugham's original work. boy, was i ever wrong to question that.
i've since followed his acting career and rank him as a great, serious actor.

thanks for the quote, flinty. admittedly, the razor's edge is the only w.s.m. book i've read, but, as i recall, the book is full of that sort of plain-spoken truth and hope.

Anonymous said...

:-) what in the cornbread hell.......ah ur a good son !

Barby

Anonymous said...

omggg i have so much to catch up on here since i was kinda away from the net the last few weeks. always enjoyable reading and something to look forward to when i have some free time later:-) Barby
thx for sharing!!!

josephine terese said...

i saw the end of the painted veil with mom a few weeks ago and liked it. probably it was slow a lot of the time and so i caught the good parts but if they ever come out with a "family friendly" version (remember jerry maguire?) i'd recommend it.


..dad, cover your eyes:)

cornbread hell said...

is there's an emoticon for "eyes closed" ?

:: gina :: said...

i did a search for irony, lol. your blog poped up and it sure made me laugh, lol.