Friday, September 7, 2007

a little porn and a whole lotta corn at the old folks home

i think mom is chompin' at the bit to show off her computer savvy, but the computer at VT has been acting up lately so *she* hasn't sent those emails i promised. they're coming eventually. it seems somebody has been downloading porn on the computer we use in the library. a couple of times this week multiple pages of some really raunchy stuff have greeted us. and lemme tell ya bub, that's an uncomfortable situation for sonnyboy. (but i deal)

- "what was THAT?"
- "pornography. you'd think with the 20:1 ratio of women to men here, fred and reggie could get their jollies some other way, huh?"
- "really?"
- "nahahahaha, (snort) i'm just kiddin', mom. i'm sure it's the kitchen help. let's go watch the penguins while this virus scan runs."

after trying to explain 'virus scan,' i said, "see, you learn something new everyday."
"well, that's good because i feel like i forget something about every minute," she replied.

never a dull moment at vickery towers. unless you live there...and are restricted to a single floor with a bunch of old geezers far worse off than you are.

and that is where friends and family come in. we make sure she gets to do something while she's still able and willing.

like the time last month when the marvelous miss josephine dropped by to take her grandmommy to the "root beer float day" extravaganza downstairs. those smiles say it all.

if you're well enough and able (and allowed) there are lots of activities. i've written here before about several of them. the activity director does a damn good job and i am truly grateful for her.

but sometimes the entertainment is beyond the pale. for me at least.

yesterday was a good example of that:
(if you dare, you can click on the photo to see a larger version.)

sounds like fun doesn't it? well OF COURSE we went. are you kiddin' me?

the "Plungeretttes" had 4 hats and 4 routines:
! - an uncle sam type hat (stars and stripes or something. i'm not sure.)
@ - a cowboy hat (some country song about texas.)
# - a yellow rose tiara thingy ("the yellow rose of texas," of course.)
$ - and a majorette hat with a big P on it ("76 trombones, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah...)

aside from introducing the 2 octogenarians in this wild and cRaZy group, about the only thing i heard besides the canned music was, "we've still got some time. which one would you like for us do again?" (ahahahahahaha. did they have but 4 routines? or did they leave some of their hats at home? ...couldn't they just GO home?)

but the crowd was unanimous and loud, so we *got* to witness them marching and pumping their plungers to "76 trombones." AGAIN! (yipee.)

i'm gonna cut this short and just post a few more captioned pictures to spread the pain, but not without first telling you that it was very well attended and that *i* was clearly the only one there who found it too corny to enjoy. believe me, if it was too corny for me it was CORN-Y.

but those old folks? they ate it up. they absolutely loved it. and i betcha they're still talking about it.

i warned you...

here they are wearing cardboard shakos. ("you learn something new everyday". today i learned that word from my crossword puzzle. click on the link, turkeys.)

and finally...this is a blurry photo of an 88 year old woman ja*king off a plunger.
that's a pretend trombone. (sorry.)


librarianne said...

I like your blog.
It's great that your mother can use the computer. That would be beyond my mom's understanding, but she enjoys her digital photo frame. Every time the slide show starts, it's like she's seeing it for the first time.

cornbread hell said...

thank you.

she can't really use it. she certainly doesn't understand it. we both enjoy the time spent together with it, though. and she really is amazed, if only in the moment.

i think it's mostly an ego boost for her to think she is finally participating in something like that. i mean...vcrs were always a befuddlement even when she had control of her faculties.

she grinned when my sister called her a *techie* the other day in an email, but she really doesn't have a clue what email is.

but who cares about that stuff? i just like that she can still smile.

i'll shut up now and look for your blog.
peace to you and yours,

Jack Hoffman said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
isis said...

Oh My, the toilet plunger ladies.... this is scary,

I hope Im not dancing around dressed like that with a toilet plunger, if I make it to 80.

cornbread hell said...

hey, it could be worse.

you could end up like the loser whose comment i deleted above yours. apparently he's some random googler for a term i jokingly used at the end of the post. (i will now go alter it)

[if that didn't make sense, i'll 'splain later. gotta run go edit to keep the creeps out...]

thanks for the comment, isis. and by the way, don't you have the longevity genes? it seems like i remember that.

flintysooner said...

I don't understand my computer either.

Dad was pretty attentive in 99 and all the TV ads started advertising their web site addresses. He would say "There's another dot com. What is a dot com?"

Not a bad question either.

cornbread hell said...

i've never been much of a computer whiz, but since we started doing computer stuff together mom's constant questions (now, what's yahoo? what is a blog?) over and over and over...*almost* make me feel smart.

today we changed seats in front of the computer for the 1st time and mom saw the actual computer. she was quite surprised to hear that the monitor wasn't the computer.

Anonymous said...

this is so funny, lol. thanks for sharing!

cornbread hell said...

i'm glad you enjoyed it. your blog is funny, too. i'll bookmark it to see how things go for you and the rugrats.


Chris said...

I found your blog on Flinty's site. What a scream....brightened my morning!

cornbread hell said...

i'm glad it did, chris.

i just read your blog. in it you mentioned your dad flew fighter planes. what kind? mine flew corsairs.

josephine terese said...

i never saw this post! can you believe it. i missed a picture of some pretty young lady and i drinking rb floats (no not rickbibby floats) AND the plunger ladies AND the fact that a perv commented on your blog!

glad you linked back to it.
wonder what else i missed...