oh yeah...?

WELL, YOU SHOULD SEE THE OTHER GUY!

1st off, i need to tell you that she's a-ok. ok?

outline of the morning -

5:38 a.m.
(ring, ring, ring...)
"hell-o"
"blah blah blah your mom had a fall this morning. she's on her way to baylor hospital."

5:58 a.m.
(i walk over to mom all tubed and wired up in a hospital bed and take her hand...)
"hey good lookin'. how you feelin'?
"i'm ok." (smile)
"what happened?"
"i don't know."

6:00-7:00
"how'd you get here?"
"where?"
"the hospital."
(she cocks her head...) "i don't know..."
"did you get to ride in an ambulance?"
"...an ambulance...i did...clear across town in an ambulance. it took a long time."
she never did remember she'd fallen, but i heard about "goin' clear across town" a dozen times. (it's a 5 minute ride.)

........................................

"i was lying here in this bed looking out at that hallway yesterday. i remember being here yesterday."
"no, mom, this just happened this morning."
"i'm sorry you have to spend your day babysitting your mom again today..."
(again??)"no, ma'am. this just happened an hour or two ago."

(repeat the above a dozen times...)

"...going clear across town in an ambulance...someone in the ambulance mentioned alzheimer's..."(pause.)
then she asked me,"if you were told you had alzheimer's would it make you feel any different about things?"

(my mom has never been an analytical person. or a thinker, yet this is a profound question. particularly the word *feel* in that sentence.)

i thought for a while and said, "i don't know."
i thought for a while longer and finally asked the obvious, "how does it make you feel?"
"i don't know," she said.

................................................

8:00-9:00
at some point the subject of leaving the hospital came up and she asked, "where would we go?"
"back to Vickery Towers."
"hmmmm...i'm trying to think what that means to me...back to vickery towers...?...i don't really know what i'm thinking, if that makes any sense.

.................................................

9:00 a.m.
getting restless. pulling on and messing with all those hoses and wires and sticky things attached to her chest and arms and finger...kept sitting up and tugging on things. trying to get free. wanted her nightgown sleeves back on her arms. tugging on tubes and wires and sticky things...pulling on her sleeves...

all the while, i'm asking her/telling her to please lay down, please be patient just a few more minutes, the tests are all run, we'll be leaving soon, lay back down, the nurse will remove those pesky things real soon...eventually she decided if she couldn't get her arms in the sleeves the best thing she could do was to just take it off.

i pretty much got the full monty.

some day i guess i'll be the one to wash her ass and lift her saggy boobs to wash under them, but...but......

"come on, mom let's get this nightgown back on you. the doctor will be back soon to remove those hoses and stuff. we'll be leaving real soon. i promise."

..........................................................

bottom line:

1 full monty.
1 ekg, 1 head/neck ct scan, 1 hip x-ray. all results normal.
1 laceration over the eye. *stitched* with super glue or something.
1 bad-ass shiner.
1 bad-ass lady.

...........................................................

as cousin nance, who gave us a ride home, said,
"all that adventure and home by 10:00 a.m."


and mary anne smiled.